The Curious Case of the Longest Movie Ever Made

If you love The Curious Case of Benjamin Button then stop reading now.

Conversation Aaron and I had via text as I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button:

Me: How did Benjamin Button go through puberty?

Aaron: Reverse

Me: That's a lazy answer

Aaron: He went out of it.

Me: So like he could bear children when he was born?

Aaron: Yeah. He was different.

Me: Well duh, that's his curse. But come on, there are some serious holes in this plot. Old people never shrink to the size of infants and it's way creepy that he falls in love with Cate Blanchett when he's like 90 and she's like 12

Aaron: Kayla, it is a fictitious tale. It assumes a certain amount of whimsy

Me: And what happens in the end? Does he turn into a fetus? That's gross. Or does he disappear? That's impossible.

Aaron: Fetus... then death.

(At this point he's just humoring me and getting very tired of responding)

Me: Death at birth? This movie is MESSED up. And, Cate is really regretting turning Brad down now that he's young and cute.

Ten minutes later

Me: THIS MOVIE SUCKS

Three minutes later

Me: I'm pretty sure I just caught Benjamin's dead mom breathing in the casket. Are you trying to sleep?

Ten minutes later

Me: Why does their kid find out about her dad growing in reverse order and not even question the reality of it? She just got mad and stormed off.

Aaron: I like the movie

Me: Are you sleep texting?

Aaron: No just lazy texting (this is code for "I'm tired of feeding this text conversation")... I don't have replies for a lot of these texts (this is code for, "will she EVER stop?!")

Me: Oh.

This is better than watching movies with him because I usually only get about three questions out before he makes me shut up and watch.