Tuesday, December 13, 2011


Recent revelations I've had:

1. I'm offended if somebody writes me a personal note and doesn't include one of the following:

-You're insanely witty
-Your humor astounds me
-You keep me in stitches
-You're the funniest girl I know
-Harry Potter RULES

2. The recipe for a funny woman is the following:

-1 part slightly disapproving significant other
-2 parts cat
-1 part (at least) cult-ish obsession (Harry Potter, Star Wars, LOTR, Dr. Who, etc... but not Star Trek. Nobody who likes Star Trek is funny.)
-Many parts of weird personality and/or mental disorder
-1 part vulnerability

And what sucks is I'm allergic to cats. So. close.
3. Liberal is NOT the opposite of Christian

4. Reindeer cars are the bomb and anybody who thinks otherwise hates Christmas. Upon them, I wish the "ghost of Christmas yet to come" because that one is scary as heck..
5. Taking muscle relaxers isn't as trippy as I had hoped. In fact it isn't trippy at all. I would ask for a refund but I didn't pay for them and they help my muscle spasms tremendously.
6. Being poor at Christmas sucks because giving gifts really is the best part.

7. You feel infinitely smarter when you are one of a few people to catch a Herman Cain joke in a room full of college students.

8. French fries are less satisfying when you find out that fast food restaurants put beef flavoring in them to make them taste better.

oh and that strawberry flavoring alone in a strawberry milkshake includes the following ingredients:
amyl acetate, amyl butyrate, amyl valerate, anethol, anisyl formate, benzyl acetate, benzyl isobutyrate, butyric acid, cinnamyl isobutyrate, cinnamyl valerate, cognac essential oil, diacetyl, dipropyl ketone, ethyl butyrate, ethyl cinnamate, ethyl heptanoate, ethyl heptylate, ethyl lactate, ethyl methylphenylglycidate, ethyl nitrate, ethyl propionate, ethyl valerate, heliotropin, hydroxyphrenyl- 2-butanone (10% solution in alcohol), ionone, isobutyl anthranilate, isobutyl butyrate, lemon essential oil, maltol, 4-methylacetophenone, methyl anthranilate, methyl benzoate, methyl cinnamate, methyl heptine carbonate, methyl naphthyl ketone, methyl salicylate, mint essential oil, neroli essential oil, nerolin, neryl isobutyrate, orris butter, phenethyl alcohol, rose, rum ether, undecalactone, vanillin and solvent.


9. When the topic of my blog comes up people mostly comment on my paint pictures. I'm fairly sure they do that because they don't know how to comment on the blog without saying... "Well..... it kind of sucks."

10. Mom doesn't find it as funny as I do that to call her on my phone I have to dial 666 (mom)

And finally, because the post was originally going to have zero paint pictures (gotta give the people what they want), I put this picture in to keep from breaking my own rules against no pics in a post.

Au revoir Spanish. Our relationship has officially come to a close. 

1 comment:

  1. I ASBOLUTELY LOVE YOU!!! You're insanely witty and your humor astounds me. I love reading your blog because you keep me in stitches. I'm going to practice my paint pictures and see if I can't try to create something as good as you creat. You're the funniest girl I know, and I can't wait to see you for Christmas...oh and Harry Potter RULES!!!